i was totally bamboozled today! iwas walking through broadmarsh browsing away when a sales man called Moses ( i know right?) came to me and made my nails really shiny, he called me pretty and i coughed up a load of dough... the moral of the story is- he called me pretty right?
And my nails are shiny, and skin smooth as koleys bum. Amazing.
xxxx
Wednesday, 17 December 2008
Tuesday, 16 December 2008
Saturday, 6 December 2008
i feel like
such a shit person. I feel like a crap mum, and just an all round fucking loser... lol its always about me isnt it.
We;re spending £30 on gas a week to keep us warm ( twce a day) and its just depressing me now, cause its like, either we eat or we're warm theres no happy medium and its making me feel down. I went upstairs a moment ago- to check on Kole, whos poorly again, no doubt down to this freezing fucking house, and his hands were freezing, as if he'd been outside, i feel like a horrible mum, how could i bring a baby into the world and not even keep hiim warm? Its disgusting.
I want to work to prove im not a scummy little girl who goes out getting pregnant and producing offspring that i cant afford to keep; but i feel right now i'm only hurting myself to prove a point to people who dont really care and will think what they want to think anyway- it works out im £40 better off... but if you include extra childcare costs, busfare and council tax, it works out we're just the same now and i dont see my boy- i do however get that hes benefiting from nursery so that i dont mind tbh, but i just feel like whats the point? why am i trying? I;m only hurting the ones i love for my ego. Which is pathetic.
I'm such a whiney little bitch.
Sorry x
We;re spending £30 on gas a week to keep us warm ( twce a day) and its just depressing me now, cause its like, either we eat or we're warm theres no happy medium and its making me feel down. I went upstairs a moment ago- to check on Kole, whos poorly again, no doubt down to this freezing fucking house, and his hands were freezing, as if he'd been outside, i feel like a horrible mum, how could i bring a baby into the world and not even keep hiim warm? Its disgusting.
I want to work to prove im not a scummy little girl who goes out getting pregnant and producing offspring that i cant afford to keep; but i feel right now i'm only hurting myself to prove a point to people who dont really care and will think what they want to think anyway- it works out im £40 better off... but if you include extra childcare costs, busfare and council tax, it works out we're just the same now and i dont see my boy- i do however get that hes benefiting from nursery so that i dont mind tbh, but i just feel like whats the point? why am i trying? I;m only hurting the ones i love for my ego. Which is pathetic.
I'm such a whiney little bitch.
Sorry x
Thursday, 4 December 2008
paperchaseee
heey
well i am exhausted- i feel like a right cop out i only did four hours!... gosh. but to be fair i had a really shitty nights sleep- i was tossing and turning all night for lord knows what reasons- i wanted to sleep so badly, and when the beautiful sleep came to me i had to be awake- the son of a bitch. was horrid.
but yeah works quite good i really quite enjoyed myself! so heres my day - 7:30 am, awake, get myself ready, kieron got kole ready for which i will be eternally grateful, 8:15- got the bus to clifton, 9:00am got kole settled in nursery ( which he loves - he didnt even care i was gone! boo.) got to work at 10:00 am, and was putting stock out all day, which wasnt even that bad i quite liked it, you sort of do your job and talk to eachother aswell, so yeah.
it was nice to speak to another person who would actually speak back...with words and no dribble- even though when my shift finished i was the first one out to the bus to pick koley up, i did miss the little guy!
so yeh, my day in a nutshell.... and ive lost kieron for a couple of days to dead space. yay!
Taters!
x
well i am exhausted- i feel like a right cop out i only did four hours!... gosh. but to be fair i had a really shitty nights sleep- i was tossing and turning all night for lord knows what reasons- i wanted to sleep so badly, and when the beautiful sleep came to me i had to be awake- the son of a bitch. was horrid.
but yeah works quite good i really quite enjoyed myself! so heres my day - 7:30 am, awake, get myself ready, kieron got kole ready for which i will be eternally grateful, 8:15- got the bus to clifton, 9:00am got kole settled in nursery ( which he loves - he didnt even care i was gone! boo.) got to work at 10:00 am, and was putting stock out all day, which wasnt even that bad i quite liked it, you sort of do your job and talk to eachother aswell, so yeah.
it was nice to speak to another person who would actually speak back...with words and no dribble- even though when my shift finished i was the first one out to the bus to pick koley up, i did miss the little guy!
so yeh, my day in a nutshell.... and ive lost kieron for a couple of days to dead space. yay!
Taters!
x
Wednesday, 3 December 2008
does anyone
ever feel, kind of repulsive? cba to go into it just know i felt it earlier.
i start work tomorrow:D
and koley has nursery on tuesday and he loved it :D i watched the whole time he was there and he just loved it, he was painting and dribbling and laughing the whole time, it was brilliant, wish i could do that every time lol, but alas i actually have to leave him with other people tomorrow for my first day.
this is quite funny just literally happened, kieron read the top bit over my shoulder this is how it went
Kieron: aWwW why did you feel like that?
Me: Not sure, just looked in the mirror and thought erugh my face has nothing going for it
...
Kieron: What? sorry i wasnt listening.
i found it funny lol, so im going to dob on him- hes watching star trek the next generation- and liking it.
well im off now, i am a boring sod arent i
and kelly sorry for making you barf...twice!
Amiesizzle.
i start work tomorrow:D
and koley has nursery on tuesday and he loved it :D i watched the whole time he was there and he just loved it, he was painting and dribbling and laughing the whole time, it was brilliant, wish i could do that every time lol, but alas i actually have to leave him with other people tomorrow for my first day.
this is quite funny just literally happened, kieron read the top bit over my shoulder this is how it went
Kieron: aWwW why did you feel like that?
Me: Not sure, just looked in the mirror and thought erugh my face has nothing going for it
...
Kieron: What? sorry i wasnt listening.
i found it funny lol, so im going to dob on him- hes watching star trek the next generation- and liking it.
well im off now, i am a boring sod arent i
and kelly sorry for making you barf...twice!
Amiesizzle.
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